HUMOR – Here is a bit of information that may come as a surprise to some people, specifically people who prefer magnificently green European-style lawns and gardens or who use Slip ‘n Slides regularly: St. George and the entire Washington County area is situated in a desert.
This news is unfortunate, given the important role of water in sustaining life and the fact that deserts have notoriously low water supplies.
In the movies, nobody lives easily in a desert. It is always a dusty, parched, chapped-lipped survival-type situation involving rattlesnakes, cacti, mirages, and worst of all – Las Vegas. This is one of those rare instances when the movies got it right. Surviving the desert is not for dummies.
Water is a precious commodity here, like sunshine and factory outlet stores are in other climates. We cannot afford to use water as though we have an unlimited supply of it. Sure, we can pay a billion dollars to have it piped in from other places, but doesn’t it make more sense to be frugal with the resources we already have? Who doesn’t love saving money on their monthly utility bill, and in the long run, their tax bill?
On that note, I have collected a few ideas that everyone can implement that will conserve water. These ideas might not do anything to stop the billion-dollar pipeline, but if nothing else you will enjoy the feeling of satisfaction that comes from being a wise steward. Plus, it is something you can sanctimoniously brag about at parties. Win, win.
If lush European landscaping is your thing, may I suggest that you stop shaving your legs? Every shower is different, but an old-fashioned shower head uses 7 to 10 gallons of drinking water per minute. Newer, low-flow models use around 2 or 3 gallons per minute. With either model you will save a lot of water by going European and skipping the shave. If you are feeling truly European, skip the shower altogether.
Are you one of those people who feel the compulsive need to flush the toilet every time they use it? I salute you, but the bad news is you are sending roughly 6 gallons of drinking water down the drain with every flush. If your commode was manufactured prior to 2000, you can earn $75 in rebate money by replacing your old toilet with a more efficient WaterSense toilet. That is $75 you can use on deodorant to mask the scent of someone who has foregone showering in the name of water conservation.
My last idea is the most exciting of all. Everyone complains about mowing their lawn. And are you aware that at least 60 percent of our drinking water is used to keep our lawns green? Are you tired of fighting nature? Get rid of your grass or at least water it less. If nothing else, be sure to water your lawn at night when the 120 degree summer sun is not out, sucking away your water and your will to live.
The only downside to getting rid of your lawn is that you will no longer have a comfortable place for your Slip ‘n Slide.
Elise Haynes chronicles family life in her blog Haynes Family Yard Sale. Any opinions stated in this column are her own and not necessarily those of St. George News.
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