2 moms, 10 kids; blending family in a same-sex marriage

Amy Thorpe, Melynda Thorpe, holding hands. Location, date not specified | Photo by Brandon Peterson, courtesy of Melynda Thorpe, St. George News

ST. GEORGE – In a changing world, the face of motherhood has also changed for two St. George women.

Between them, Melynda and Amy Thorpe have 10 children from previous marriages – Melynda Thorpe has two sons, and Amy Thorpe has three sons and five daughters. Amy Thorpe is a teacher, and Melynda Thorpe is a small-business owner. The two women were married last year.

Amy Thorpe, left, and Melynda Thorpe, date and location not specified | Photo courtesy of Melynda Thorpe, St. George News
L-R: Amy Thorpe, Melynda Thorpe, date and location not specified | Photo courtesy of Melynda Thorpe, St. George News

“As much as it’s abnormal, it’s normal,” Melynda Thorpe said. “We do homework. We make dinner. Amy reads to the girls to help them fall asleep.”

The Thorpes have a nontraditional family structure, but they say their home has the most important elements that a good home needs: Their children know they are loved and safe; they know they can talk to their moms about anything; and they see an example of two parents who work hard and respect each other.

“I wish every child had their mother and their father that gave birth to them in the home, but it’s just not where we’re at anymore,” Amy Thorpe said.

Two of the Thorpes’ children are grown; the others live part-time with them.

“We have circulating through our home eight of the 10,” Amy Thorpe said.

Adjusting to a new life with two moms has been challenging for the Thorpes’ children. But, through it all, the kids have been loving and respectful, Amy Thorpe said.

“It wasn’t the paradigm that they grew up with. It wasn’t the paradigm that Melynda and I grew up with,” she said.

“There’s a lifestyle difference between what we would choose to do and what the children would choose to do,” she added.

Melynda Thorpe and Amy Thorpe were both raised within The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. They said their devout LDS mothers have been sweet and kind and patient in the face of their daughters’ choices.

“Their faith is deeply rooted in the LDS culture, but they have never been unkind to us but have been genuine in expressing love, and just continually kind,” Amy Thorpe said. “And this is not easy for them either – not what they had hoped for.”

The Thorpes said they’ve also met with love and kindness from LDS church members in their neighborhood. Youth leaders and other church members, and even missionaries, have reached out to them and have actively made an effort to spend time with their children. This is especially helpful when it comes to their boys; as women, it isn’t always easy to relate to their sons.

“There are times when our teenage boys get a little more motherly attention than they wish they would get,” Melynda Thorpe said.

In addition to male family members who are present in the kids’ lives, men within the church have stepped up when there is a need that Melynda Thorpe and Amy Thorpe haven’t been able to meet.

“We just have the coolest ward members,” Melynda Thorpe said, “and (the boys) have Young Men’s leaders who come over and take them to do things and take them to lunch. They have a lot of friends who are in our neighborhood and in our ward and in our schools.”

“There’s not a lack of role models in our lives,” she added.

The kids’ dads are also actively involved and share custody of the children.

“My children’s fathers each have been very kind to us,” Amy Thorpe said. “There’s never been one statement of judgment or one unkind thing said to us by them. They have been kind, and we still parent together. We parent together – and that’s important.”

In choosing a new life path together, Amy Thorpe said, she and Melynda Thorpe have reinforced that they honor their kids’ choices – and they have been careful not to impose this path change on the children.

“We support our sons who are choosing to serve missions,” Melynda Thorpe said. “… We’ll read scriptures with them when they want to read scriptures.”

As mothers, Amy Thorpe said, she and Melynda Thorpe have complementary talents. Amy Thorpe is the structured, organized mom who keeps family life flowing smoothly; Melynda Thorpe is the fun, playful mom and the kids’ cheerleader and celebrator.

“She has the ability to make our kids feels special and important,” Amy Thorpe said of Melynda Thorpe, “and I love that about her.”

She’s the most phenomenal mother that I have ever met, besides my own,” Melynda Thorpe said of Amy Thorpe. “She keeps our home organized and she keeps things moving smoothly. We all know that we are loved.”

At the end of the day, Melynda Thorpe said, being mothers is the most important thing to both of them – and being identified by the word “mother” surpasses identification as a same-sex couple.

“I think Amy and I are more comfortable saying, ‘Hi, nice to meet you. I’m a mother,’” Melynda Thorpe said.

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41 Comments

  • izzymuse May 10, 2015 at 9:59 am

    Great article. Mother is a superpower! Mothers are the heart of every home and community. No matter what arrangement we find a family in, Love is the main ingredient for a happy family. I don’t care if there are two mothers, two fathers, a mother and a father, a single mother, a single father – no matter what – LOVE is what makes a happy home. God bless the Thorpe family and every family today on Mother’s Day. Each of us is here because of our mothers. God bless all mothers today. Honor womanhood. I hope all of us gives love and gratitude to one another today.

    • 42214 May 10, 2015 at 10:26 am

      Nobody would be here if we depended on one of those two mothers. According to my 7th grade science class, biology doesn’t work that way.

      • Simone May 10, 2015 at 1:20 pm

        Tell me then 42214, how did they have 10 children? Oh that’s right they were both previously married to men. I suggest you read the article before commenting next time. 🙂

        • 42214 May 10, 2015 at 2:18 pm

          I was replying to izzymuse, “Each of us is here because of our mothers”. I was pointing out the obvious that 2 mothers don’t make a baby. I did read the article. You didn’t read the context of my reply apparently.

          • Simone May 10, 2015 at 3:58 pm

            You said “Nobody would be here if we depended on one of those two mothers”. Forgive if I thought that by you saying that, you were talking specifically about the two women in the article.

    • Simone May 10, 2015 at 1:21 pm

      Great reply IZZYMUSE. I completely agree.

  • ladybugavenger May 10, 2015 at 11:55 am

    You can’t force me to accept 2 women or 2 men getting married. I can respect an individual but you can’t force me to accept gay marriage as natural or normal. I was a born from a man and a women, not a man and a man or a woman and a woman.

    • Simone May 10, 2015 at 1:16 pm

      Uh huh. Tell me something, how is ANYONE forcing you to do anything that is contrary to your beliefs?

      • ladybugavenger May 10, 2015 at 5:29 pm

        I’m just saying/you can’t force me, not saying anyone is…thanks Simone for your concern 🙂

        • Simone May 10, 2015 at 6:26 pm

          So then what is the point of the comment?

        • ladybugavenger May 10, 2015 at 9:57 pm

          Simone, obviously this stuff is already forced down your throat and you’ve swallowed it. You are probably brainwashed too.

          • Simone May 11, 2015 at 8:20 am

            Oh? Well who do you think forced it down my throat then?

  • Simone May 10, 2015 at 1:10 pm

    Happy Mothers Day to Amy and Melynda Thorpe! 🙂

  • fun bag May 10, 2015 at 1:14 pm

    The poor men they were married to had no idea they were marrying lesbians. I find it disgusting and offensive the choices some people make. If they wanna be homosexual fine, but make up your mind about it. Imagine the wake of destruction these lesbians have left in other’s lives.

    • Simone May 10, 2015 at 1:24 pm

      RUDE!

      • izzymuse May 10, 2015 at 3:19 pm

        SIMONE, we have to be careful how much attention we give FUN BAG. I think he’s craving attention so bad that he posts his regular “baiting comments” hoping someone will bite the bait. But you’re right, he’s usually rude. I’m hoping he learns to articulate his ideas in a more effective manner someday, but until then the comments will be polluted by his childish scribbles of “blah, blah, blah”s, immature name calling, and ignorant rants. God bless you FUN BAG. I hope you learn how to debate and argue without immature and “below the belt” tactics someday. Til then, pass the bag of “blah, blah, blahs” I ran out of those after my youngest child grew up. 🙂

        • fun bag May 10, 2015 at 4:31 pm

          I think what you don’t realize is that i dont care what you think. out of all ur ramblings on here i cant recall anything notable in the least. step up ur game if u wanna impress me

      • ladybugavenger May 10, 2015 at 5:30 pm

        What fun bag said was not rude

    • 42214 May 10, 2015 at 1:35 pm

      Maybe the guys they were married to were such jerks it turned them into lesbians.

      • fun bag May 10, 2015 at 2:15 pm

        such a thing possible?

      • ladybugavenger May 10, 2015 at 5:34 pm

        Just like you can’t turn a drug addict into an addict.oh turn a drug addict I to a not a drug addict….it’s a choice.

        • Mike May 11, 2015 at 9:00 am

          Do you remember when you “chose” to be heterosexual? Leave ’em alone. It isn’t hurting you. Really, it’s not.

          • ladybugavenger May 12, 2015 at 1:21 am

            Yep, don’t you? I also remember the first time I chose to do a drug, and I liked them. Just as a gay person likes the same sex.

          • ladybugavenger May 12, 2015 at 1:33 am

            I also remember the day I chose to never touch a drug again. But back to your choice question: if you were honest with yourself you would see you made a choice too…you either liked it or you didn’t.

          • Mike May 12, 2015 at 8:11 am

            LBA, you really don’t get it. Never mind.

  • Neil May 10, 2015 at 1:50 pm

    I’ve had the privilege of meeting Amy and Melinda. They are two of the most awesome, authentic people I have ever met. Happy Mother’s Day to both of them!

    • ladybugavenger May 10, 2015 at 5:31 pm

      The only contrary thing is, is that they left a man for a women

      • ladybugavenger May 10, 2015 at 5:32 pm

        And they had children to deal with it

        • fun bag May 10, 2015 at 6:28 pm

          i’ve known lesbians that have went from being homosexual to straight to back to homosexual. I have never met a lesbian that was genuine and didn’t have some kind of backward and selfish agenda. They are master manipulators. I’m sure there are good ones out there somewhere, but they must be few and far between. I wish they would choose their sexuality before they go around wrecking marriages and creating chaos. If this is the kind of thing they are doing then they are not role models for children at all…

          • Neil May 11, 2015 at 9:45 am

            bigot

            [big-uh t]

            noun
            1.
            a person who is utterly intolerant of any differing creed, belief, or opinion.

          • fun bag May 11, 2015 at 12:59 pm

            well, we might be forced by law to tolerate the homosexual epidemic, but that doesn’t mean we have to like it…

      • Neil May 11, 2015 at 9:34 am

        prejudice

        [prej-uh-dis]

        noun
        1.
        an unfavorable opinion or feeling formed beforehand or without knowledge, thought, or reason.
        2.
        any preconceived opinion or feeling, either favorable or unfavorable.
        3.
        unreasonable feelings, opinions, or attitudes, especially of a hostile nature, regarding an ethnic, racial, social, or religious group.

  • fun bag May 10, 2015 at 2:14 pm

    The whole lesbian agenda article mixed in with the molly mormon, nicey-nice, goody-good theme almost makes me want to throw up ahahah.

  • fun bag May 10, 2015 at 6:52 pm

    and one last thing. It is very hypocritical to do a mormon themed article about a homosexual couple, since official church policy is that they are living in sin. This would be an easy case to excommunicate them if they are still on the roles. But I give these ladies respect for coming out for an interview like this in good ol’ stg. Takes guts to come out and do an interview like this in this craphole town since you’re almost guaranteed to be persecuted somehow, and I know i’d never do it. All the best to the both of them…

  • homer498 May 11, 2015 at 11:30 am

    Hey! I skipped this article and went straight to the “comments” looking for some good laughs. I don’t read these because I need enlightening on the stupidity of the human race! So someone please make some funnies before I start crying. Everyone knows the arguments, the sides, the players, so shut up and make me laugh, or just shut up! All of you!

    • 42214 May 11, 2015 at 4:07 pm

      Best comment I’ve seen yet. It sure beats quoting the dictionary, how boring.

    • fun bag May 11, 2015 at 4:55 pm

      we don’t post on here to give idiots a free laugh

      • 42214 May 11, 2015 at 6:03 pm

        Fun Bag, you’re so petulant. Don’t take yourself so seriously.

      • homer498 May 12, 2015 at 7:07 am

        Who’s the idiot? My name isn’t “FUN BAG”. Change your name to “DEE BAG” if you can’t give up some free laughs! This battle was won, and lost 25 years ago. Wake up! The ignorant bigot side has lost every major battle of the last 100 years! Go join ISIS if you want to fit in.

        • 42214 May 12, 2015 at 9:16 am

          Homer you’re killing me. Major smackdown of the “D” Bag

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